Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. –Mark Twain
We were at the library again searching for useful information for our project.
I didn’t use to look around and stare at people, I’ve always considered it rude, not appropriate at all, but I raised my head when he passed our table and stared.
He just screamed complicated with his dark eyes and his messy light brown hair. He was gorgeous indeed, but… something was wrong with me!
”What are you looking at?” my friend whispered in my ear.
How foolish I was! The poor boy probably thinks I was a creep, a freak!
”I wasn’t looking at anything…”
”Yes, you were. Intensely may I add..”
She was right.
For the next two weeks I’ve been a little bit distracted. Everyone could see it, so it wouldn’t have mattered if I had tried to deny it.
Sometimes, when I closed my eyes, I could see him reading and listening music on his headphones. And it wasn’t just because he was pretty or of his great taste in books, but because of the… sadness and loss I remarked in his eyes. He seemed broken, just as hurt as I was. At least at the first sight.
I was about to leave the music store, and the clumsy me, I almost feel on my ass just after closing the door. Here we go, he was there and catched me just like a superhero, in his big, warm hands.
I felt the impact with his body quickly, but instead of being embarrassed, I actually enjoyed his touch on my waist.
More, as cliche as it sounds, the emptiness came when he gently put me on my own feet.
What was wrong with me?
”I’m so, so sorry!” I blushed realizing what’s just happen’.
I gave him a look and I saw him smiling.
His eyes were as beautiful as I remembered, but unfortunately, they didn’t met directly mine. They were focused on my lips like he was trying to decipher what I’ve just said.
”No problem. I’m glad to see you again, Library Girl.”
I blushed even more, his words making me suddenly feel embarrassed.
”So you remember.” Me.
I was surprised. We didn’t even talk, plus I wasn’t such a beautiful person or remarkable in any way.
I was normal.
He had smiled weirdly before he took out his phone, tasted some words then handed it me the device.
”Can you please write here what you said earlier?”
He sighed, took the phone from my hands gently. I gave him a look and I bet I looked like a dumb when I saw the text:
I am deaf.
Woah… I certainly didn’t see that coming.
”Oh.” I managed to say after I had taken a really deep breath.
Woah again… How…?
He didn’t seem to be…deaf.
Smart! How can someone look like he’s deaf?!
What’s wrong with my mind?
”I see. It’s okay if you don’t want to stay around and let me know you, I’ll not judge you. I’m actually used to this.”
Oh My God! People ran away from him, that was terrible!
”I’d rather that than see them look at me with pity. Like you do right now.”
I do what?
”What? No, I don’t…”
I stopped myself by grabbing the phone from his hands without breaking our eye contact:
I do not pity you, mister Mysterious Stranger who I met in a library. I’m actually just taken by surprise of your…condition. I’ve never met someone who had this kind of disabilities. I am truly sorry for staring at you. And I could never feel pity for you, just admiration, respect.
I gave him a moment, time to read the message, then wrapped my hands around his waist.
”I’m Ansel.” he said after a second and I ran a hand through my hair.
”I am Dakota.”
A month. It’d been a whole month and we were getting really close. We shared everything we felt. And it was great. I hadn’t cried anymore so much when my parents fought. He was my escape, the only person who knew all of my problems and had always been there for me.
One day, just one day… I’d never been so scared before that day when I wanted to go away.
”Are you alright?”
His voice was pure care and concern, giving me some vibrant butterflies with every letter.
”I’m fine.” I whispered and glued myself to his chest.
”Dakota, this is not okay! They must stop fighting or they’ll destroy you. And I can’t let them destroy your healthy. You’re one of the most important persons to me, I can’t risk losing you.”
He made a pause.
”Let’s run, go away together. My grandfather left me some money, a lot actually, we can use it until we finish our studies. Then I’ll get a job and… I don’t know, we can even move to England if that’s what you want, we…”
I laughed. ” That’s impossible, it’s just a dream that will never come true. My parents, our families would go insane.”
”I don’t care. We can let them some notes, even talk with them on the phone after our landing, everything you want, just come with me!”
Woaaah. I shook my head in both: surprise and confusion.
I’ve barely known this guy, but it felt so right and good to be in his rms. He was so protective, he made me feel safe, home!
I can’t. We’ve known each other for a month. We can’t run away together from all of our problems, it’s too dangerous and childish.-I wrote on a piece of paper for him and spoke at the same time.
He was’t completely deaf and he almost heard what I said. The doctors told me we must talk to him, it will help him with the recovery.
”No, it’s not. I feel complete with you, like I’ve known you my entire life, what you feel too, I’m pretty sure. I promise you I’ll be a gentleman and won’t steal kisses when you sleep. We can keep in touch with our families and have a new start. We can go to a new place with new names. I’ll be Christian and you’ll be Rose just as in the game we played last week. Just think about it.”
But it was so insane! He was so insane!
The feeling of his fingers was precious. I wanted to look at him, and get lost in his eyes forever.
The things are so insane!
*photos source: Helena Lino